TAR 12 – Episode 9 – Saved by the Bell

slater.jpg

Pictured: A.C. Slater, super stud. Check out those guns, that Jeri curl. Honestly, what girl could resist?

Anyway, moving on to The Amazing Race. If I’ve got one beef about the show, I guess I dislike the way some teams teeter on the brink of disaster brought about by their own idiocy, and the show saves them and gives them new life.

I dislike the non-elimination legs on the Amazing Race. Even though there’s always a penalty for checking in last at the Amazing Yellow Bathmat, they’re still ultimately rewarded: “Okay, you did really, really poorly. Honestly, you were clueless out there. But hooray! You still move on to the next round!” Kinda makes the whole leg seem kind of pointless. It’s the TV equivalent of the NHL regular season. Every team advances simply by competing — except, of course, the Chicago Blackhawks.

I guess the TAR Spoiler Alert should come early this time around. So, SPOILERS!


Legs like the one that Rachel & TK ran this time around — magically edited and condensed for your viewing pleasure! — should lead to automatic Philimination.

This team waltzed out of the starting gate, dicked around with the slowest flights to the finish line (it’s earliest to arrive, not earliest to leave that counts), and yet still managed to survive. It was like they performed a huge shout-out to Season 1’s Team Guido near-elimination to Team Momily.

Permit me to enter the Wayback Machine…

In that particular episode, which contained the saddest Philimination ever, Team Guido beat Nancy & Emily to a Fast Forward and then promptly stopped racing. Instead, they assumed that the next bus out of town was hours off. Rather than check for other options, they rested on their laurels and checked into a hotel for some rest. Meanwhile, EVERY other team got ahead of the Guidos. They would have been eliminated were it not for Team Momily. Frustrated by losing out to the Guidos, and frustrated by the confusion that is India: The Great Equalizer — they deliberately broke a rule, and suffered a 12-hour penalty. After the FF, the Guidos did nothing right to win that leg, yet lived to see another day.

Sometimes, karma’s just out to lunch.

Order of finish:

Ronald & Christina – Look ma! No bitching! However, I have to defend Ron a bit here. I thought his assessment of Chris as a poor driver was more nastiness aimed at his daughter. The truth is that she’s absolutely terrifying behind the wheel. I’ve never seen a TAR racer so discombobulated in a regular car. I’m surprised the Japanese couple she transported didn’t soil themselves several times over.

Jennifer & Nathan – Woo-hoo! No first for you! Last week I said that I hope they make the final 3 just to watch someone else beat them. Now I rescind that statement and go back to my earlier one. Which is that they need to go away ASAP and leave no forwarding address. I’m exhausted from rolling my eyes about them.

Nicolas & Donald – Carry my bag, Nick! I’m tired! You know what’s funny? That Nick’s day job as a pilot involves him getting from one place to the other without getting hopelessly lost. How come he can’t do that on land?

Rachel & TK – These guys are like a pair of Mr. Magoos. Forever stumbling through life, avoiding danger by pure luck and never being consciously aware of it. Apparently, excessive pot intake makes you invincible. Look up in the sky! Is it a bird, is it a plane? No, it’s Captain Roachclip!

Predicted order of Philimination:

1. Nicolas & Donald
2. Kynt & Vyxsin
3. Ronald & Christina
4. Shana & Jennifer
5. Kate & Pat
6. Azaria & Hendekea
7.
Ari & Staella
8.
Marianna & Julia
9. Rachel & TK
10. Lorena & Jason
11. Jennifer & Nathan

Actual order of Philimination:

1. Ari & Staella
2. Kate & Pat
3. Marianna & Julia
4. Lorena & Jason
5. Shana & Jennifer
6. Azaria & Hendekea
7. Kynt & Vyxsin

8.

9.
10.
11.

Next week – If there’s another non-elimination, I’ll spit nickels.

Links to previous TAR sojourns:

Advertisements

Posted on January 9, 2008, in TV and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Stupid DVR somehow set to record only a half hour of the show, so I missed all the airport drama up through most of the Roadblock, and picked it up after there.

    TK and Rachel seem like nice people, but they are without a doubt the worst racers I have ever seen on this show, period, and I’ve seen every season. Their ability to handle tasks fairly well and their Luck of the Stupid continues to get them through. I can’t tell you how pissed I’ll be if they win. I hate Nate and Jen, but even they deserve the million over these two — at least Nate and Jen are good racers. Just annoying people.

    I’m flabbergasted by Nick’s horrible lack of navigation skills as well. I guess as a pilot, he always has someone else handle the navigating for him.

  1. Pingback: TAR 12 - Episode 10 - Happy Birthday, Jen! « Red Herrings

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: