TAR 12 – Episodes 3-4 – Hernias for All!
Posted by Patrick
Forgive me the lapse in reporting on The Amazing Race. Work came first. Stupid work.
So far on the race we had elephants and sheep. For these two episodes, we get camels, chickens and goats. It’s like a short-attention span traipse through a National Geographic. Breakdowns of remaining racers, breakdowns of racers’ breakdowns and lamentations over my poor predictions after the jump…
Kynt & Vyxsin – Surprisingly resilient, and perfectly suited to a dance contest, where Kynt channels the Star Wars kid to a T. It’s true, like most of the other teams still around, I underestimated them.
Jennifer & Nathan – She’s downright silly and mean sometimes. That “Glad you made it” thing she said to every team that boarded the plane when she and Nate thought they had jumped to an amazing lead, only to find out that everybody else was on the same plane? Why didn’t she just say what she meant: “F*** you. And look, another team, f***you too.” Her boyfriend is also a bit dim, but not nearly as spiteful. They kinda suck.
Ronald & Christina – The most interesting team gets even more interesting as Ron is still an ass, but now he’s sportin’ a hernia too. As if his daughter wasn’t dealing with enough of his bitching, now she’s gotta deal with this. I can’t see them lasting much longer. The pain’s gonna get too bad to continue, especially during the inevitable physical challenges that will arise and I’ll at least feel sorry for him because of the pain. But really, I feel Christina’s pain much more.
Shana & Jennifer – Wow. They’re old and whiny, but still kicking. Luckily they used the “U-Turn” penalty on Lorena and Jason in the last leg, because they’re always in the back of the pack.
Azaria & Hendekea – Good for these siblings, not letting Jen and Nate beat them to the finish mat in episode 4. It resulted in one of the best inter-team confrontations, however. Jen: “They should have let us win because they’ve already won two legs.” Hendekea: “Then get the lead out of your ass.”
Nicolas & Donald – I just found out that Nick and Don are the son and father-in-law of ballsy alt-country singer Robbie Fulks. Awesome. Had I known this earlier, I would have totally given them more credit for gumption. Go Gramps and Flyboy.
Rachel & TK – Somebody give these guys a compass. They really need someone to wave their arms at each clue box or task location and shout “Hey, over here!” Not since Season 3’s Team Who have I seen a team that wandered as aimlessly.
Marianna & Julia – Bad move by the girls in Ep. 3, where they were eliminated because they had a heart and assisted a freaked-out Lorena. Ah well, they were dull but dang cute. Maybe the editors just didn’t want to ruin their attractiveness by letting them speak.
Lorena & Jason – Wow, a lactating camel made Lorena completely lose her shit. I’ll bet even Colin & Christie were shaking their heads at that one. Even after surviving the
oxencamels, L & J couldn’t gain back enough ground, and one of my original Final Three kicks the bucket. I couldn’t be happier, because Jason was tempting fate by cracking out his own version of the Hating-Hat.
Predicted order of Philimination:
1. Nicolas & Donald
2. Kynt & Vyxsin
3. Ronald & Christina
4. Shana & Jennifer
Kate & Pat
6. Azaria & Hendekea
Ari & Staella
Marianna & Julia
9. Rachel & TK
Lorena & Jason
11. Jennifer & Nathan
Actual order of Philimination:
1. Ari & Staella
2. Kate & Pat
3. Marianna & Julia
4. Lorena & Jason
Boy, I haven’t picked a single eliminated team in the first four weeks. It’s okay because I think it bodes well for the season. The more evenly matched that teams are, the more interesting the show gets. Now that Lorena and Jason are gone, I really think an underdog like Nick & Don or Shana & Jennifer can sneak into the Final Three. I still don’t have a lot of confidence in Ron & Christina, because of Ron’s injury and quick-to-blame trigger. Kent & Vixen are indeed dark horses, because I’m still not convinced by their athletic ability or street smarts.
Based on what I know now, I am again calling for Ron & Christina to be last to the mat this Sunday. Stay tuned.