TAR 12 – Episode 2 – Getting dirty
This week, 10 teams traveled from Ireland to the Netherlands, where they lifted furniture, hunted for marked bikes among thousands, and did a little ditch-vaulting. Tensions continued to rise, and we got our first gratuitous nudity of the season. Probably not the nudity you were looking for though.
Updates on the racers and how the race is shaping up so far after the jump…
Kynt & Vyxsin -Still wild cards, though hardly goths (they’re just not sad enough). Time will tell on these two, but they’ve proven to be mutually supportive and relatively capable. Vyxsin, who hoisted grandfather clocks and televisions in this episode, is definitely the brawn of the duo but there have been few truly physical tasks to be performed yet. A running, lifting, climbing Detour could blow these two away. But so far, they’ve been able to negotiate their surroundings fairly well. As long as their Roadblocks don’t involve sheep.
Jennifer & Nathan – Hey, they still suck. They’ve just got to be a lock for the finals.
Ronald & Christina – Hmmm. The most interesting development of this episode. After fooling us all for a week, they turn out to be just as dysfunctional as your own family. Ronald browbeats Christina to the point of tears and Christina takes it over and over. Ron even tried to pull this crap with another young contestant, Nicolas, who amazingly let him blow off steam without screaming at him to mind his own GD business. I still see these guys getting a relatively early departure from TAR. That is, if Christina doesn’t push her father off a gorge first.
Shana & Jennifer – Maybe not as bad of racers as I first had thought. Stepped up from episode 1, where they looked fairly weary and unprepared for the race. I hope they’re also starting to realize they’re not as hot as they originally had thought they were.
Azaria & Hendekea – This team seems locked in right now, and it’s mostly because they haven’t faced adversity yet. Very smart of them to buy tickets on the train out of Amsterdam, when all the other teams queued up in the station and subsequently missed said choo-choo. The editors are trying to make Azaria look like a control freak, but with Ronald on the race, who’d notice?
Lorena & Jason – Great, now she’s all smiles, because they’re in the lead. She’s a two-face and perhaps just slightly troubled, as evidenced in the scenes from next week where she loses it about not being able to milk a large animal (yak? rhino?). The fact that they came in first means they’re a force to be reckoned with if they can somehow traverse the Flo meltdowns that will come periodically.
Nicolas & Donald – Good on them for not ripping Ronald a new a-hole. Bad on them for allowing me to have nightmares all week of a mud-caked Donald stripped down to his skivvies and thrusting himself forward with a phallic object. Keep your clothes on, you geriatric hippie.
Marianna & Julia – Bah, they look good, but I’m not convinced they’re wily (smart) enough to win this thing. Also, editing has conspired against them. Perhaps because they’re also slightly boring. Where’s the fire, ladies? I mean, other than the one in my loins?
Rachel & TK – Two legs in, and two times in a row they went riiiiiiiiight past the pit stop. This time, they biked right by Phil standing in a field with two Dutch youth who I would assume were clog-bearing. Also, despite his familarity with ropes made of hemp, TK can’t tie knots, so watch out for that stumbling block in the future.
Kate & Pat – Gone baby gone. It really just seemed like a vacation, because they had zero giddyup. However, I will love them forever for being ministers who understand that when it comes to winning a reality show, God is in the tub.
Predicted order of Philimination:
1. Nicolas & Donald Ari & Staella
2. Kynt & Vyxsin Kate & Pat
3. Ronald & Christina
4. Shana & Jennifer
5. Kate & Pat
6. Azaria & Hendekea
7. Ari & Staella
8. Marianna & Julia
9. Rachel & TK
10. Lorena & Jason
11. Jennifer & Nathan
0 for 2 so far, but I’m feeling pretty confident that unless Ronald & Christina iron out their problems, the next leg could be their last.